COVID-19 UPDATE: my Midtown Manhattan office is currently closed. I am available for online therapy sessions (for NY residents only) via a secure video platform.

July 4th is often synonymous with freedom – but it’s a theme and feeling that you can consider at any time of year. Pause for a moment and notice – where and when do you feel stuck?

What would it be like to feel freer in your interactions, relationships & everyday life?

Here are three things you can stop saying now.

1) Saying yes. How many times have you said yes to something you really didn’t want to do? Was it was because you felt you “should” or you worried what others would say or think about you if you didn’t?

It’s okay to pause and check in before giving a reply. What would it be like to say “let me think about it, I’ll get back to you asap”? What would it be like to ask yourself “What do I really want to do?”

2) Saying no. On the total flip side, always saying no to things that scare you can keep you stuck and unhappy. I’m not saying you have to take off for Fiji tomorrow, but how about trying a new food, walking a different way to work, or joining a friend for a new type of workout class? You might find that you can surprise yourself by saying yes when you usually say no. Give yourself permission to not have to do or experience this new thing perfectly.

3) Saying mean things to yourself. Do you notice how you speak to yourself – either in front of others or in your own head? I find that many of the women I work with are super critical of themselves. I think it’s okay to have expectations of yourself – but when it crosses a line into feeling like you can never do anything right or are the world’s biggest (insert mean thing you sometimes call yourself here), then it may be time to stop and take stock. How would you speak to a good friend or a small child? Turn some of that gentleness and love inwards and see how it feels.

If any of these feel particularly challenging, feel free to schedule your free 20 minute phone consultation. I’d love to chat about how I can help you get unstuck from repetitive patterns and relationships.